17岁美国使命召唤宅男假扮海豹突击队遭绑架

万万没想到由于过于逼真和惹眼竟然引起了"基地"组织在美国的下属团体的注意、这些成员通过技术手段定位了他的上网地点将其绑架。并作为重要收获将其送至也门、少年在一个地下室受到严x拷打，什么都招了招了可还是没说出半点儿有价值的美军情报。恐怖份子因此认定他是受过专业特殊训练的突击队成员，还以为这名少年的无知只是在装傻所以继续逼供......

最后这名少年被整整一个排的真海豹部队救了出来，人还活着，拉登保佑。

下面是把他救出来的海豹部队说的话，以下内容来自网络翻译。

“When we checked Mr. Munroe’s Facebook, we discovered an extensively crafted profile outlining him as being a member of the dissolved SEAL Team Six,” said Lieutenant Commander Charles Aimes. “It even came with a full set of pictures including one fast-roping out of a Blackhawk helicopter, which on closer observation was actually hi***iding down a playground fire pole in air soft garb with a Blackhawk photoshopped into the background. It would have had even me convinced except for that fact that I know that no real Navy SEAL is ****ing dumb enough to put this on Facebook.”

“当我们检查二货先生的FB主页时，我们发现了一个被仔细地假造的个人档案，宣传他是海豹六队的成员”

“甚至还有一套从黑鹰直升机上绳降的照片，如果你仔细看的话可以看出是他从WG场地的一根爬杆上往下滑，黑鹰直升机是被软件加到背景里的。要不是我很确定没有真的海豹队员会二到把这些放到FB上去的话连我都信了”——参与调查的海豹部队技术人员(少校)，Charles Aimes

“These shit-brained keyboard commandos think it’s really cool and bad-ass to act like special operations forces,” said Chief John, “They don’t seem to be down with ****ing reality where terrorists are actively trying to carry out reprisals against us.”

“这些脑子进屎的键盘突击队认为宣传自己是特种部队成员很好玩”

“他们似乎傻到意识不到恐怖分子正在试图打击报复我们”——Chief John(参与营救任务的队员)

“It probably seemed like all fun and games for him in Call Of Duty,” said Team Commander Lieutenant Andy, “Though shit gets real pretty ****ing fast when some asshole goes to clamp a pair of booster cables to your junk… ”

“可能对他来说装兵很好玩。”

“很快就有人找上门来为了往你的小XX上夹大铁夹子了”——参与此次营救任务的海豹队员(少校)，Andy